Gay Man Skips Sister's Wedding for Gay Club... Find Out Why

by Emell Adolphus

EDGE Media Network Contributor

Saturday October 1, 2022
Originally published on September 30, 2022

Social media commentators are getting behind a gay man who skipped his sister's wedding to a homophobe to go to the gay bar with his boyfriend.

As reported by Newsweek, the man, who posted anonymously on Reddit as u/throwaway363738839, was praised by many commenters for choosing his mental health and taking a stand against silently suffering at his sister's wedding.

In the post titled "AITA for skipping my homophobic sister's wedding to go to a gay club?" the 23-year-old man said he and his older sister were close growing up. After he came out, she and his family were supportive until she met her fiancé.

"He grew up in a very traditional Christian household," the post read. "They met at a frat mixer at Bama (she was in a sorority, he was in a frat)."

Soon after, his sister reportedly began to become visibly uncomfortable with discussions of guys and dating. Her fiancé began to change her views.

"One time when her fiancé was on Facetime with us, I mentioned a Tinder date with a guy, and she told him I was joking," the post read. "We sort of grew apart as we got older."

The poster said the two kept in touch after he moved to California to go to college but he began to hide more of himself from her.

The post has raved more than 9,700 upvotes and 1,200 comments since.

After months of an increasingly strained relationship, including a conversation about how him bringing a date to the wedding would make families uncomfortable, his sister's wedding day arrived on the same day as his boyfriend's birthday. He chose his boyfriend.

He told his sister the morning of the wedding that he would no longer be a groomsman, and they haven't spoken since.

"I felt guilty for missing my sister's wedding, and I know I'm not blameless here: we were close for so long that it hurts regardless of what she said to me," the post read. "But I felt so invalidated during that rehearsal dinner, and I made a decision, and I can't undo that."

To the situation, he questioned: "Is it time to cut her off for a while, or should I be the one to apologize?"

Commentators felt he did the right thing.

"Your sister & her husband do not accept you and your partner for who you are," one commenter noted. "Instead, they want you to fit into their picture of what the wedding should look like. They are pretty intolerant and obviously homophobic."

Another commenter added, "Her comment about you 'forcing it on everyone else' is bonkers. I find it heartbreaking that she allowed this bigoted homophobe and his family to change her views and ruin her relationship with you...a gay club sounds much more fun than a wedding with guests who judge you for whom you love."

Others theorized that his sister chose a homophobic man because she is indeed homophobic.

"Her 'don't rub it in peoples faces' is rich since you're going to a wedding where they're rubbing their hetero relationship on everyone there," said the commentator.

What's your take? Did he do the right thing?